Memoirs of a Dragon Hunter Page 16

  Without another word she leaped up and ran toward the back of the office. Teresita and Veronica exchanged glances. Sasha, who had been looking out of the window, did a little twirl that made her black-and-white-striped miniskirt spin out and plopped herself down in the Witness’s chair.

  “Food poisoning, do you think?” Veronica asked.

  “Probably. But I like to call it opportunity! Hey, Sasha, take a look on Aspen Fuller’s computer for us, would you?”

  “Teresita!” Veronica looked nervously over her shoulder, obviously worried someone in the office would see Sasha at the desk. No one was paying them the slightest bit of attention. “Do not encourage her to snoop. There’s probably all sorts of private info on there.”

  “Of course there is, but how else are we going to get the info we need? And speaking of which, why did you dig your claws into me? That hurt!”

  “I’m sorry, but what Helen told me was secret. At least I think it was. And I didn’t want you telling Aspen about the abused woman.”

  “You told me,” she pointed out. “And Ian.”

  “You caught me when I was weak,” Veronica said, lifting her chin in that manner that so delighted him. “And Ian is a dragon hunter, and promised to help me find her.”

  “I did?” Ian raised both eyebrows. He had no recollection of doing any such thing.

  “Yes, you did. Yesterday, when we were making the deal about you teaching me. I told you about this woman that my sister wanted me to help.”

  “Ah.” He didn’t remember agreeing to that, but decided that it may well fall under the umbrella of general dragon hunter education.

  “What do you see?” Teresita asked Sasha, who had dutifully started tapping on the laptop keys.

  “Hang on, I’m almost done.”

  “You are?” Veronica scooted forward on her chair, glancing again over her shoulder. “What did you find?”

  Sasha looked up, the antennae bobbing gently with the movement of her head. “It’s kind of confusing at first, but you know, I don’t blame these birds for being angry. It’s not right those green things trying to steal their eggs.”

  “You’re playing Angry Birds?” Teresita made an exaggerated slap to her head before giving Veronica a shove. “Go look before Aspen gets done barfing.”

  “I am not going to do anything so morally disreputable,” Veronica objected.

  Teresita gave her another shove. “Come on. It’s the perfect opportunity.”

  “Then you do it,” Veronica said.

  “This is your caper, babe. Ian and me, we’re just the trusty sidekicks.”

  “I beg your pardon?” Ian gave Teresita his best “I am a dragon, you should really fear me” look, but it was apparently wasted on her.

  She made shooing gestures toward the laptop again. “Just do it quickly, and no one will be the wiser.”

  “Done! Finished the level,” Sasha said, rising and stretching. “Mama needs caffeine. There’s a coffee place on the corner—let me know when you get the info you want.”

  The emphasis on her last few words was impossible to miss. So that’s why Sasha insisted he spend his morning here—the Witness must have some information on the courier. Ian considered the laptop, then watched Sasha bounce out of the office before turning to examine the rest of the employees. No one was even glancing their way.

  “Hmm.” Ian headed for the laptop just as Veronica, evidently having had enough of Teresita, did the same.

  “Oh…uh…” She hesitated. “I was going to look for the addresses. Did you want to do that?”

  “No, by all means, feel free to go first,” Ian said, gesturing at it. “I was simply going to look for a bit of information on my own project.”

  “Really?” Her head tipped to the side in a wholly adorable way that had him wanting to kiss her. “Is that why you’re here? I was going to ask, because at first I thought you might be following me, but then I realized you wouldn’t bring Sasha with you if that was the case—”

  “People!” Teresita interrupted. “I hate to break this up, but Aspen could be back at any time. Get a move on and find those addresses, babe.”

  “She’s right,” Veronica said, taking a seat and flicking around on the laptop screen. “Although I want to point out that if we get caught, I’m totally blaming you, Teresita.”

  “That’s the spirit. I’ll stand guard to make sure she doesn’t walk in just when you are copying all her private files,” her friend said, rising and moving to the door. Ian watched closely when Veronica flipped through the windows that were open on the Witness’s computer. One of the screens had the title Church of the Mortified Flesh of the Anguished Witness. He decided that was a likely spot to look, assuming the Witness did, in fact, have information about the courier, but before he could say anything, Veronica flipped past it to a screen full of property listings, highlighted for the area.

  “I think we need a secret word in case Aspen comes back suddenly,” Teresita said from where she was casually slouched against the door. “What about Albuquerque?”

  “Too hard to say,” Veronica murmured, her attention on the screen.

  “Whip-poor-will, then. I like that word. Whiiiip-poor-wiiill. It has meat, that word.”

  Ian wondered at what point his life had turned into a Hollywood spy farce, and decided he probably didn’t want to know.

  “Here we go.” Veronica pulled a small notepad from her pocket. “There were six people who signed rental papers during the last six weeks, only one of which is a solo female. I’ll just write down the info and we’ll be—”

  “Whip-poor-will! Whip-poor-will!”

  Ian caught sight of Aspen crossing the room, a paper towel crumpled in one hand. Hurriedly, Veronica ran for her chair. Ian sat down and flipped back through the windows.

  “What are you doing?” Veronica whispered, glancing over her shoulder again. “I wrote down the info already.”

  “I’m putting the screens back in the order you found them,” he answered, doing that, but also taking the few seconds required to scan the document with the church’s name on it. As he scrolled down it, he scanned the text, freezing at the list of three names, his own included. Following that were a list of half a dozen demons that had been seen in the area and the addresses of four “safe houses” for members of the church. He quickly memorized the addresses, then took his place by Veronica.

  And just in time. Teresita stood in the doorway, clearly blocking view of the inside, and said loudly when the Witness approached, “You okay? I was just going to check on you. We were worried you were, you know, stuck on the toilet and might need some meds, or extra toilet paper, or something.”

  “No, no, I’m fine. I felt much better once I splashed a little water on my face.” The Witness came back into the office and sat down, glancing first at the computer screen, then quickly over to Teresita and Ian.

  He kept his expression neutral. Veronica patted her pockets and made a distressed sound. Without a word, he pulled out of his pocket a small bottle of hand sanitizer and handed it to her.

  She sent him a look of surprised appreciation and blithely dabbed it on her hands.

  “Since your motives are as pure as they can be, I’m sure,” the Witness said, evidently deciding no funny business had gone on while she was away, “I have decided to give you the information you seek.”

  “Awesome,” Veronica said. “We much appreciate it.”

  The Witness tapped on her keyboard before saying, “There are, in fact, two rentals that have been taken off the market in the last two months. Here are their addresses. Do you have paper?”

  Veronica brought out her notepad and made a show of writing down the two addresses. She frowned at them for a moment before catching Ian’s eye. Clearly, the information didn’t match what she’d found herself.

  “Thank you,” Veronica said. “I will definitely do the welcome wagon thing with them.”

  The phone rang at that moment. The Witness glanced at it and ti
ghtened her lips before saying, “Excuse me a moment…Hello? I’m afraid I have some people with me right now. If you can leave a number— Oh, you’re here at last. Good. No, we’ll come out and meet you shortly.” She hung up and tried to give them a smile, but it failed miserably. She was looking more than a little green under her makeup. She reached for a tissue and dabbed at her mouth. “Where were we?”

  “We were thanking you for your help,” Veronica said, rising. “We’ll leave now since you look so under the weather.”

  “You are entirely welcome. Please don’t hesitate to come to Fuller Realty if you have any questions about—urgh.” While she was speaking, she had stuck her free hand out to shake hands with first Teresita, then Veronica, but the second the latter hesitantly shook her hand, the Witness doubled over, her hand over her mouth.

  “Oh, dear, you really are sick. Sip a little club soda, if you can,” Teresita advised. “Works wonders on my kids when they are ralphy.”

  The Witness glared at her for a moment, then straightened up, clearly trying to fight the nausea, her gaze raking Ian before turning to Veronica. Still clutching the tissue, she hissed through clenched teeth, “Just who the hell are you?”

  Veronica took a step back, obviously surprised at the vehemence in her voice and raw fury that lit her eyes. Ian moved closer to Veronica, just in case the Witness might think of attacking. “Me? I told you my name—”

  “Not your name. Who are you? Who sent you here?” Her gaze scanned Veronica angrily, clearly trying to find some sign. “What are you?”

  “I’m…I’m…” Unseen by the Witness, Veronica’s hand found Ian’s, her fingers tight with obvious distress. He gave them a reassuring squeeze.

  “What exactly are you accusing my…girlfriend…of?” He moved slightly so that he partially blocked Veronica from the Witness’s acid gaze. “She has done nothing but seek your assistance so that she might aid others.”

  “She’s done something to me,” the Witness hissed. “She’s not human.”

  “Of course she’s human,” Teresita chimed in from where she was standing at the door. Ian sent her a quick glance that, thankfully, she rightly interpreted, for she took her friend’s arm and all but tugged her out of the room. “She’s as human as you or I. Well! This has been fun, but just look at the time. We have a yoga appointment, don’t we, Ronnie? I’m sure we do. Nice seeing you again, Aspen. Hope you feel better. Love to John and the kiddies. Thanks for all the help. Later, tater!”

  Teresita had backed up while she spoke, taking Veronica with her.

  “A word to the wise,” Ian said in a flat, unemotional voice that he had perfected when speaking to Anzo. “Do not harass my girlfriend. She has done nothing to earn your venom.”

  “Ian,” the woman said, her nostrils flaring. She either did not notice, or didn’t care that Veronica and Teresita had hurried out of the realty office. “What did you say your surname was?”

  “I didn’t,” he answered, and with a brief nod, he turned and strolled out to the street.

  To his annoyance, Veronica was nowhere in sight. Part of him wanted to run after her and demand to know what she was doing having contact with a Witness, while the other part of him wanted to focus on his own jobs. The sooner he found the esprits, the sooner he could break ties with Anzo, and then he would, at last, be free. Free of his bondage, free of the burden set on him with Sasha, and free to do what he was born to do—roam the earth unimpeded, protecting the innocent and bringing justice where there was none.

  He strode to the coffee shop to find Sasha, wondering why the idea of being free to do his job no longer seemed so attractive. He had a suspicion the reason was tied up with a dark-haired temptress whose quirky ways entranced him like no other.

  Damn it all to Abaddon and back.

  Insert Some Public Domain Poetry Quote Here That Lets the Reader Know Just How Upset I Am. Unless Mr. Manny Says That’s More Foreshadowing.

  SHE’S NOT HUMAN.

  The words echoed in my head as Teresita pulled me out of the office, chatting with the other employees in that friendly way she had, but keeping us moving until we were clear of Aspen Fuller and her compatriots. My skin felt like it was crawling when we hurried out of the building, and the animal in my mind encouraged me to run away, to go immediately back to the sanctuary of my apartment, and hide from the hate and accusation that had been so visible in Aspen’s eyes. But hiding simply was not possible, not least because my apartment was no longer a sanctuary.

  “That was a close one,” Teresita said, glancing back at the building. “Do you think we should rescue Ian?”

  “I don’t think he needs help, no,” I said, fighting with my own fearful emotions. “He’s pretty badass, and Aspen didn’t look like she was going to attack him right then and there.”

  “You’re right. He’s a big boy, and he has a big sword. Hey, that’s an innuendo.” She dug an elbow into my side. I paid no attention and just kept walking, blind to everything but the struggle within me.

  “I wonder what information he was trying to steal from Aspen. He didn’t tell you anything about that, did he?” Teresita asked. “You know, in pillow talk and such?”

  Just the thought of my apartment made my stomach ball up onto itself. I knew I should take charge of the mess, but it seemed too much right now.

  She’s not human.

  I shook my head to try to get rid of that accusatory voice. Of course I was human. The idea of anything else was ludicrous…Why would simply being near me make her sick? I shook my head again. No. I couldn’t think about that, either.

  “Maybe you could let Dan and me join your threesome next time. We’d love that. Or better yet, you and I and Sasha could get a three-way going.”

  I sighed at my desperate attempt of denial. I knew from long years of therapy that denial never worked. It only put off the problem, usually making it worse than ever. I needed to cope with my life, starting right that moment. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, making Teresita bump into me. “Where are we?”

  “About two blocks away from Aspen’s office. You with me again?”

  “What do you mean?” I turned around to retrace our steps, since my car was parked in the opposite direction.

  “Oh, nothing. Just that you didn’t bat an eyelash at the idea of having a three-way with Sasha and me.”

  “What is wrong with you?” I asked her, giving her a long, stern look. “You know I would never do a threesome, despite what Ian claimed. That was just because…because…”

  “Yes?” she asked with annoying curiosity.

  “Well, I don’t know why he said that, or why he let Sasha rub all over him, but he must have had a rea— Oh.” A thought so profound struck me that I stopped where I was, right in the middle of a crosswalk, only continuing when a car honked at me. “That has to be it.”

  “What is?”

  “Yesterday, Ian made a big song and dance about me being from the Court place that Sasha is from, and made sure I was sitting on the couch, where she had a sweater and pair of leggings, when that demon came to his apartment. I bet you he did that because Sasha smells different.”

  “She does?” Teresita wrinkled her forehead. “She smelled fine to me, not that I stuck my nose in her armpit or anything.”

  “Demons smell awful. It makes sense that people who come from not-heaven must smell, too. And that would explain why Sasha rubbed herself on Ian’s chest in Aspen’s office—she was covering him in Court smell. All of which means that Aspen…No, but how could she?”

  “How could she what? And who are we talking about, Sasha or Aspen?”

  I got into my car, checking the street, but there was no sign of either Ian or Sasha.

  Teresita got in next to me, her voice plaintive. “I hate it when you are mysterious. Dish, sister.”

  “It means, my dear…” I slid her a fast look before starting up my car. “Aspen Fuller isn’t what she seems. If she’s the sort of person who can smell a demon, and wh
o is obviously affected by being near demon hunters, then she’s not at all normal. And she had the balls to ask me what I was. Ha!”

  “Where are we going?” Teresita asked when I pulled out.

  “Remember that package I gave you this morning?”

  “When you borrowed my second best pair of yoga pants, and told me to hide the package somewhere that the kids couldn’t find it? Of course I remember that. It was only two hours ago.”

  “Well, that package contains my replacement sword, and we’re going to get it.”

  “Ooh,” she said, looking impressed. “Are you going fighting?”

  “In a manner of speaking. I’ve finally realized that Ian was right all along—a dragon hunter should never be without a sword. I’m going to take my replacement, find that woman Helen wanted me to help, and then go back to deal with my apartment. And I’m not going to let my anxiety beast get the better of me.”

  “Look at you, girl!” Teresita said, doing a supportive fist pump. “That’s the badass superhero I know you are. Right, so as your trusty sidekick, I get to come with you to help the abused woman, right? Because I made up a care package for her, with a few things like some tampons, and socks and underwear, and a bunch of samples of shampoo and things. And chocolate, of course.”

  “Of course you can come. I’m sure she’ll be very grateful for your kit of goodies.” I felt moderately better about coming to a decision, although a niggling thought worried in the back of my mind.

  Just what was Ian at Aspen Fuller’s office to find? I knew he was trying to find someone for his demon lord boss, but how a Realtor was supposed to help was beyond my understanding.

  “Unless she’s not a real Realtor,” I said aloud.

  “Oh, she is—she sold my mom her condo, remember? But I just bet you that she’s something else, too,” Teresita said, her voice filled with satisfied suspicion. “That whole shtick with asking you what you were, when all along she was just as guilty of being woo-woo.”